The Real Me

The real me, 

I'm living my life the best I can.

Sometimes I'm happy.

Sometimes I'm the smart ass.

Sometimes I'm overwhelmed.

Sometimes I'm angry.

Sometimes I'm upset.

Sometimes I'm flustered.

Sometimes I'm not the smile I front.

No reason to worry about my past.

No reason to worry about my future.

It is the here and now.

And when I'm down and out I write. 

To bear the light in my soul so bright,

I got to keep it strong.

When I get burnt I need ice,

And this is my device

It heals.

Its my window into a world that as I will it, I make it.

In my fantasy, it is the love I need.

Its healing powers are beyond the greatest divinity.

I wish I was better at telling the world how I feel.

I must use complicated similes and things that don't make sense.

It is my angel whisper in the night.

I don't make it so public, my thoughts to myself.

It is the stars held above my head so high.

It is to keep me alive.

Beautiful Chaos

I can never portray my thoughts exactly how I want to. 

I Remember

I remember when I saw you for the first time.
I remember how you made me feel.
I remember the ripped blue jeans you wore the first, and second time we met.
I remember the words you first spoke to me.
I remember the last words you spoke to me.
I remember how when we held hands, you refused to hold still.
I remember how your breathe felt on my skin.
I remember how much I missed you when you left.
I remember not wanting to feel that kind of pain ever again.
I remember now, to never remember you again.

The Great Gatsby

“So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.” 
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

“I hope she'll be a fool -- that's the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool.” 
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

“And so with the sunshine and the great bursts of leaves growing on the trees, just as things grow in fast movies, I had that familiar conviction that life was beginning over again with the summer.” 
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

“He smiled understandingly-much more than understandingly. It was one of those rare smiles with a quality of eternal reassurance in it, that you may come across four or five times in life. It faced--or seemed to face--the whole eternal world for an instant, and then concentrated on you with an irresistible prejudice in your favor. It understood you just as far as you wanted to be understood, believed in you as you would like to believe in yourself, and assured you that it had precisely the impression of you that, at your best, you hoped to convey.” 
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

“There are only the pursued, the pursuing, the busy and the tired.” 
― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

How to Cope with Annoying People:

Step 1: Wait for them to say something annoying.

Step 2:

•  Look at them with a disgusted look on your face.
• Make fun of them directly, tell them how annoying they are.
• Literally just stare at them.
• Punch them squarely in their annoying face.

Step 3: Resume your life. Stay beautiful.

Conversations with a Stranger

“I wish I could live the rest of my life forgetting,” she told him, distractedly braiding her hair as she gazed out the plane’s tiny square window.

“Forgetting what?” He asked after a pause, turning his head to look at the pretty girl beside him; she had been relatively quiet for the first few hours of their flight. 

She sighed. “Forgetting what it felt like to live.”

Not knowing how to respond to this, he went back to his magazine, pretending to solve a completed Suduku puzzle. He could feel her stare on him.

“What’s your name?” She asked him a moment later.

“Julian.”

“Julian, have you ever  been in love?”

It was a strange question for a stranger to ask, but he answered as honestly as he could. “No. I don’t think so.”

Bored, she turned back to her window. “I have.”

“Oh?” He responded, not quite ready for their conversation to end.

“Yes.” The girl replied, and then fell silent again.